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Home

by Aviscerall

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1.
Finding Home 01:33
2.
Vibin' 02:23
3.
4.
Coffee Shop 01:54
5.
Chillin' 02:20
6.
Sunkissed 02:01
7.
Healing 01:45
8.
9.
10.
Clockin' Out 01:42
11.
Romance 02:12
12.
Progress 02:49
13.
14.
15.
Onett 01:28

about

This album is also available through all major streaming services, Soundcloud, and Audius!

Spotify: open.spotify.com/artist/39eka3QcVZN0xYUX5nvtXM?si=_ylet3CBQeKgIVoLMJtQDg

Soundcloud: soundcloud.com/aviscerall

Audius: audius.co/aviscerall

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Album Art By @ridartwork

www.instagram.com/ridartwork

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Home is the question I’ve been asking myself lately. In the idea of, what makes you belong in a “Home”, and when do you know when you’ve found “Home”? This album is a reflection of my current Home, both the positive and the negative.

I started asking myself this question after my father passed away, and I had to leave my job at Google. I was living in Silicon Valley, in San Jose, but I knew for my family the right thing to do was to go back to Southern California. So after setting down roots in the bay area, and making some unforgettable friends, I had to leave my home to do what I felt was the right thing to do. I also left because some of my closest friends I had made in college were all still down in Long Beach. So I knew I had to go back “Home”.

This album being released at the end of 2020, you may think Home also was sparked by the quarantines caused by COVID-19. Which is a possibility, however, it was actually driven by the growing racial tension that occurred after the murder of George Floyd. I think I may have grown up in the “golden age” of America’s struggle with racism. Growing up in Southern California in the United States of America, I honestly thought racism was a relic of the past, that would rear its ugly head here and there, but it’s not something that would drastically influence my life, especially in California. Hell, the only presidential election I actually remember before 2016, was the first black president.

However, as I got older, I started to notice some of the retaliation to black people. It started off with small things here and there. And it kept growing to the point that, once a month on the internet, I’d watch black people be gunned down by the police and/or civilians (who were walking away free from their crimes). Others noticed this too, I am sure, as it was when small groups of people started noticing the Black Lives Matter movement. I actually participated in a Black Lives Matters protest while I lived in Seattle. So when I saw the murder of George Floyd, at this point, I just silently internalized the pain of another black man being murdered. And then something beautiful happened, people actually cared, and streets spoke up to say enough is enough. All this pain I was feeling about what my “Home” actually is, others felt it too.

However, it almost destroyed me to see the response. The other side of people, and the media, responded with apathy, calling people who protested and made their voice heard, thugs. Living so close to LA, I’d hear helicopters during all the protests, and I’d always think to myself: “There they go to senselessly beat the people who are trying their best to make sure that me, and people like me, can live a normal life”. And then to learn more facts like, 1 in 1000 of black males will die at the hands of police brutality in America, and that California is actually one of the worst states for black incarceration rates. It really gave new meaning to the phrase: “hits close to home”. I never knew something could “hit so close to home”, when it’s actually your “Home”.

2019 was a year with really high highs for me, and really low lows. But one of the highs was the amount I got to travel. With all the uncertainty, and feeling that my “Home” wasn’t what I thought it was, I started reminiscing on these places I got to experience. I got to visit South Africa, Japan, Germany, New York, and Denver. My bucket list of travel wasn’t very long, so I already crossed it all off. But experiencing new cultures, and seeing new ways of life, really made me think. Going to South Africa, and not feeling like a minority. Or going to Japan, and seeing all of my favorite passions as a part of the mainstream. Could these be my “Home”? Even though I felt a new sense of belonging in these places, at the same time, in other ways, I felt like I didn’t.

Lastly, I’m a bi-racial person, 75% black, 25% white. One thing that I feel like almost every bi-racial person struggles with, is Identity. I think Earl Sweatshirt said it best: “Too black for the white kids and too white for the blacks”. Grappling that identity struggle is a hard one, because you have to learn that you aren’t one or the other, but you are in fact that you are both. You have to learn it’s okay to be “White-washed” by your black peers, but also your “one drop” of black blood will ensure that you are black. You kind of have to “build your own acceptance” of yourself, and how to navigate this weird double life. I follow a couple of mental health pages on Instagram, and I saw something really interesting posted by @diversifyyournarrative and @thepeahceproject . The post was about “Racial Imposter Syndrome”, and mentioned how “it leads them to question their identity, ethnic heritage, and what it means to belong home”. Which again, leads us back to here. Is “Home” something you build? Like my apartment with all my cool stuff, like my sticker coffee table I’ve taken with me at my past 5 places, located next to my favorite skateparks, all of my closest friends, and my family? Or is “Home” something you belong in, where you can feel comfortable being yourself physically and mentally?

Many different buddies of mine have mentioned how much of myself I put into my music. But I’ve never done it intentionally. So Home is exactly that. It’s a reflection of myself, reflecting on my “Home”.

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Daniel / NetNavi: Dawg, you already know. You have always been the real one. You're family to me, and I got your back till the day I die. Thanks for all the collab, and feedback, and coming up with the OG Groovy Godzilla name haha!

@ridartwork - Thank you so much for doing the album art! :)

Gabe / Astroblk - One of the most talented and funniest guys I know. Definitely a huge influence on me as an artist, and one of the OG Groovy Godzilla influences and supporters. You the homie dude. And their music is AMAZING! You sleepin' on him if you don't know the name. :)

Joe, Josh, Ryan, and K-Dawg: Y'all for real are the homies on this one. Thanks for keeping me up till 4am, yelling at me to make more music. Y'all really truly believed in me, and because of it, we have this album. Thank you.

Ben / Nolan / Elvin / Nick / Pablo - Y'all the real ones too. Y'all are the chillest, dopest people in the LB music scene. And I am so glad to call y'all my friends. So glad I'm back in LB to chill with y'all, and y'all know you can hit me up whenever. Looking forward to see where y'all go with your art, and glad we could be homies :) Really looking forward to chillin’ with y’all after the pandemic! :)

Pacific Plaza / Virtual Memory / Pocari Sweat Homies: This is mostly from my Groovy Kaiju alias, but y’all mean so much to me and it definitely bleeds into all of my music adventures. Alyx, Earthboy Advance, DATAGIRL, Limosuine, POPCULTR, Michael (No Genki), and Reese. Y'all have been nothing but super rad people! Inside and outside of the music, y'all are super rad, and I am so glad we have been able to meet, and chill and stuff. Really looking forward to more musical adventures, and hit me up whenever! Super stoked for all the fun times to come, and thanks for all of the opportunities! :)

Rosewood: I got mad love for all of y’all. Literally the best thing that could have happened to me during this pandemic. Even though I didn’t really show it, y’all really did help me through a really tough time, and y’all really helped me get through this. I got mad love for all of y’all in Rosewood, and looking forward to more of our URL and IRL adventures in the future :)

Mom: Thank you so much. I’m already eternally grateful to you, because you’ve been nothing but an amazing mother to me. But especially during this pandemic, we’ve both been so strong being safe. And I just want you to know I really appreciate you, and I love you. You’ve also been such a huge help to me during this pandemic, and with all of the recent huge life changes with my ex and things. Thank you Mom.

Dad: Rest in peace. I know we became close before you got sick. But I really wish I could have spent more time with you. I think of you everyday, and nothing could have prepared me for the days, months, and years it’s going to be without you. I love you dad, and I hope you can see what I’m doing with this music thing haha! See you on the other side.

credits

released January 29, 2021

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Aviscerall Long Beach, California

I'm a programmer, skateboarder, internet surfer, hip hop producer and artist.

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